Is It Summer?

Lets talk about the weather....I've always wondered what it is with Memorial day and the weather. It seems like every year when this holiday comes up the weather turns cold and shotty. So I say lets try a year when we don't put Memorial Day on our calendars, only to celebrate it anyway so as to try to trick mother nature into not bringing this weather. Im gonna do it. All next year Im gonna deny there is a Memorial Day, just to surprise everyone on Memorial Day and celebrate it. And the weather will be warm, sunny, and beautiful and you all can thank me for it.....
It also seems to be a trend this year with the temperature climbing up to record levels, just to drop FORTY degrees the next day with snow falling. Is this a product of global warming? Are my plastic trash bags causing this weather phenomenon? Do I need to write the clothing companies and ask them to continue their winter collections through July? What about the Polar Bears and ice caps? Is the government behind this like they were behind Katrina? Maybe it's Rush Limbaugh and the Republicans...... or the oil comapnies or OPEC..... I don't know. All I know is that Im SICK AND TIRED OF IT. When it's time for it to be cold, it needs to be cold. When it's time to be hot, it needs to be hot. Mother nature is a whore for doing this to me and I don't like it. In protest, Im gonna BBQ in my cream colored speedo in the middle of January when it's -15 degrees outside and see how she likes that! Dirty pirate hooker.....

Greatest film sequences in movie history

Brandon, get used to this.... I beat you to the clips, so don't even try to copie me on your page....Here are a couple of the best movie clips of all time. It's Fat Bastard at his best in Goldmember. Absolutely beautiful. If I ever get to be his size, I'm gonna be exactly like him. The second clip is of Ron Burgundy. Again, one of the best movie clips of all time. I'll admit they are a bit crude, but you're crazy if they don't at least get a smile on your face.....But if you don't think these are the best movie clips of all time, I will fight you....

http://youtube.com/watch?v=f71VqFgwPy4

http://youtube.com/watch?v=G_sYD5yhrmM

AHH.... SUMMER

So Summer is here. (Well, It is in my book at least) School's out, it's getting darker later, it's FINALLY getting warmer, the sun is shining, the birds are singing, and all these elements make for another perfect year for blowing things up... I love explosions. Any kind, of any size. I dont know why I didn't pursue that as a career. I'd probably get too wreckless with my education... The clan (you know who you are) has been blowing things up for years. We never get tired of it. The bombs are nothing elaborate. Just powder from freworks is all, but it makes for some good entertainment. Some day we'll make something big. Like Mythbusters big. Something that involves an outhouse, a rubber dingie, a manican, maybe a mascot like COSMO, a lot of fire, and a lake. This would be completely legal of course...

I've included two videos that were made of some of our more recent endeavers. Thanks to my homie Jeff for the masterful compilation of some done up at Bear Lake. The video of the microwave was done from my camera, situated on a fence about twenty yards away. It's funny how it took so long for the fuse to burn. It just added suspence to the whole thing. I thought that I had situated the camera a safe distance away, but yes, that piece of microwave did hit as close to the camera as it sounds... It struck a pole next to it, a pole that I (being the genius that I am) was standing right behind. Good thing I'm as skinny as one!

White Trash NASCAR fan....

BRISTOL

ONE OF MY GOALS IN LIFE....

I am one. I admit it. I have the side burns, the hats, I'm growin the gut, and I have the NASCAR passion to prove it. But I ask you, what's wrong with being one? On any give race day, more people fill the stands of those race tracks then any other sporting event in the states. Period. Im talking 100's of thousands of people. At the Brickyard 400 in Indy, it's said that over 400,000 people are there to see the race. That's HUGE! And I wanna be one of them sonbiznitches out there rootin on them southern boys. I hear that attending one of these events is like nothing else on earth. The sights (watching not only the race, but the characters that attend these races), the deafening sounds, the smell of Sonoko fuel in the air, a thousand horse power roaring at 6000 RPM. Besides, name me any sporting event other than NASCAR that starts with a PRAYER and the national anthem.....There's nothin more american and it's gotta be amazing.

People say that it's not a sport. That them boys aren't athletes. Have you driven 190+ miles per hour for four or five straight hours or for 300+ miles? I sure haven't and probably couldn't physically take it... I read a simple philisophical take on why NASCAR divers are athletes. It's this: NASCAR is a sport. Anyone who participates in a sport is an athlete. Nascar drivers are athletes. There, it's simple as that.

NASCAR is not all that bad, and it's not all bad being a NASCAR fan. That's all Im trying to say. Even if you don't like it, you can't deny the legitimacy of it all. And if you wanna label me as white trash, go ahead. Im proud of it. Just be sure to put EAST SIDE in front of it!

BEER CANNON

So, without further adeau, I think that's how it's spelled, I bring to you one of my goals in life. A BEER CANNON. I don't drink beer, but it brings tears to my eyes to see it shot out of a cannon like this one: Simply BEAUTIFUL

http://youtube.com/watch?v=lmBRZ7UR3Rw